Fear and Love went out shopping for pants

Fear and Love went shopping for new pants together. They both needed pants desperately. Fear hated to shop, and felt there was never anything that fit right, or looked good in the stores. Love was crazy about shopping, and always wanted to buy everything on the racks. Fear hadn’t considered what sort of pants they’d buy, and hoped the stores weren’t crowded. Love wanted a pair of those really tight, stretch denim, lo-rise, rocker pants cause they look like so much fun.

When they got to the store, Love ran through the aisels touching all the fabric and laughing out loud. Fear stood near a sales person hoping they would notice and ask if they could assist them in any way. Love laughed from across the store, and invited Fear into the fitting room.

“What do think of these?” Asked Love, slipping into a pair of purple velvet whaler bells.

“Oh dude, I hate those pants, and I can see your butt-crack.”

“You don’t like them?”

“It’s not that, but I bet people are gonna think you wanna be Cherry Vanilla in those. Don’t get those.”

“Well, what about these?” Asked Love, quickly trying on another pair of pants. “Do you like these?”

Fear looked at Love, up and down slowly. What Fear felt was admiration, a little excitement, and some envy. Fear wanted to have a butt like Love’s. Fear’s butt, according to Fear, was wide, and low, and uncomely. So fear looked at Love and said, “They’re ok.”

“Do you like them?”

“If you do.”

Love laughed and patted Fear on the arm, “You always say stuff like that, and I never know if you’re just being nice, or what… Just tell me, do you like them or not?”

Fear looked down at the floor of the fitting room and said,” I dunno…”

Love was beginning to feel selfish, and uncomfortable holding Fear hostage in this little fitting room and asking opinions and making them feel bad. This wasn’t as much fun as Love had hoped it would be after all.

“Aren’t you going to try any pants on?” Love asked Fear quietly.

“No. I don’t really need any pants. Let’s get out of here and go home.”

So they left the store without buying anything.


  1. It’s interesting how so often we let fear take the lead.

  2. How cute and fun imagining Fear and Love going to buy pants. That’s just exactly how it would be!

    Love is so wonderful, and it’s sad that Fear was able to mess with Love’s enthusiasm. Such truth in this story.

  3. this reminds me of your story about buying lucky jeans, and the other one about buying a jacket. except this one isn’t quite as cheerful. too bad fear couldn’t just let love enjoy the pants. :(

    wow, i just realized, you talk more about buying clothes than i do. j/k ;)

  4. I love that you’ve keyed into the clothes.

    Clothes, naturally are a device, a metaphor. Though it is true, I’ve gotten more interested in clothes lately. Certainly more interested than I have been in approaching 20 years. for the Dubtribe years, I never tried anything new, I only wore the same style of jeans, and the freebie t-shirts I got given. Rarely did I ever buy anything for myself.

    These days I am interested and willing. My mind has shifted on the subject, and I am having some fun.

    Still, it is only a metaphor in this story. It could have easily been “Love and Fear go shopping for pickles.”

    But I suppose the relateability factor might have been substantially diminished, no?